Archive | May, 2016

On being alone

29 May

Just to clarify the “alone” I am referring to is not “lonely”.

The “alone” I am referring to is the intentional act of keeping away from other people (or keeping other people away from you). This may sound like a horror-show to the people who shine in social situations. This post is not for them.

This post is for those people who sometimes feel awkward/stressed/nervous around other (not all, but most) people and need their alone time. 

I am one of those people. 

I don’t know about you but sometimes I just want to be alone, alone watching TV, watching a movie, reading, just alone for the sake of being not around people. 

Many people feel this way, those same people disregard “wanting to be alone” as “lonely” which is totally WRONG.

Lonely is when you want company, alone is when you want no company. See the difference? 

In other words: when you have a friend or family member who is purposely trying to keep away… Just let them be. They want to be alone, to think, write, read, watch TV. 

You’ll know they want to be alone when they give you one-word answers or when they just get angry for no apparent reason. Just give it time. If they want to talk, they’ll talk. Sometimes it is a sign that something is wrong, but a lot of the time that is not the case.

Also sometimes wanting to be alone means “do not enter the space I am in” and “do not talk to me”, you’ll know this is the case with a look, tone of voice, body language or the obvious “please I want to be alone” verbal response. 

What I have said may sound obvious like “duh of course, I’m not an idiot!” But at the same time a little thought needs to be gone through before you invade someone’s “alone-ness”.

– T 

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“That’s unladylike!” Part 1: Anger 

15 May

Being a women/girl means that at least one person in your life that has constantly commented on your reactions, actions, etc as “unladylike”.

Well this series that I’m starting is sort of trying to end this “That’s unladylike!” (Hence the title) sense of thinking because this is 2016 and what women should and should not do and what men should and should not do shouldn’t exist, I mean come on haven’t we gotten over the stereotypes that women belong in the kitchen and men open pickle jars thing?

Basically this is based on my real life encounters and hope that you, the many (not really) readers would see and help change the idea that “unladylike” doesn’t and should not exist. Not in 2016. Not ever.

And so it begins…

Anger is a natural part of life… So natural it is built in as an emotion-instinct-feeling-reaction in every single human being. I know this because anger is my dominant emotion… The world angers me ok!

Anyways it was a spring day like any other (one that was particularly hot actually!) and I had just had the most brilliant (bias) idea of going to the cinema when all of a sudden the tickets for our film choice was sold out and of course that meant finding another film with the same time because we were at the ticket booth and the line of people behind us consisted of around 20 people. So we decided to see some random action movie (you know how there’s always one of those).

When we got to the popcorn stand we basically started a serious (WHY) argument about cheese-flavoured popcorn (to which I say NO IT IS NOT REAL CHEESE AND SMELLS LIKE FARTS) and obviously she wanted to get it and yeah DON’T STINK UP THE FREAKIN MOVIE was basically my point and anyways it was a silly argument which basically made me hold a grudge and you know when that happens I basically fake smile and am much quieter than usual. So basically we argued I was mad and some random person came up to us and basically said that arguing out loud (we weren’t even yelling) is unlady-like.

And that ends the story of the popcorn, the action movie and the rude, kindof sexist old person.

My point is how is it ok for guys to be angry but girls have to be all prim and proper and not sad or angry in public? Is that even possible also SEXIST so yeah.

My big point here is there’s a difference between being rude (seriously both guys and girls have to stop the rudeness) and showing your feelings which again is not rude and is not wrong, so why the double standards?

Everybody has feelings, let em out if you want to it’s up to you, not some random person in the middle of a cinema hall.

-T